First off, my apologies to David Chapman Carpenter for stealing a line from his song "Dive", which is one of my all time favorites. But it's the only way I can express what I am feeling.
I have let my life get out of control in the past few years, and I am done. I am ready to take the reigns, and find a new direction on many fronts. I am committed to my financials (which are in the scary zone right now). I am committed to finding a partner in the world. I am committed to be happy again. And I am committed to my health. It all starts right here, right now.
I have been packing lunch with me, but falling into the temptation of holiday work treats, so that has to be corrected. I have also been having really bad dinners. I will work on that too.
I have a guy that I have been casually dating who I need to move--either out or in full time. I will set the ground work to let him decide what it will be.
As far as financials, well, it's going to be tricky for a bit. I do have to get some more gifts. But after that, total restriction. And I need to sell or unload my car somehow. Wish me luck on that.
OK, I feel better posting this to the world. Cross your fingers, wish me luck, I am taking the plunge starting today!
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
I Agree!
I must say, I am not always a huge fan of NYRR. Many times their staff gets very angry at runners. They make you jump through lots of hoops. They are expensive. But, in all fairness, they don't have an easy job with the location and number of runners the NYC area has to offer.
But the below post is enough to change my mind. I love Mary's response to a NY Times article where fast runners say people like me shouldn't run. I really love it. Well worded, well stated, and completely true. Diversity applies to more than just race, sexual orientation, ethnic background, etc.
http://tinyurl.com/yhacgok
"We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by."
- Will Rogers
But the below post is enough to change my mind. I love Mary's response to a NY Times article where fast runners say people like me shouldn't run. I really love it. Well worded, well stated, and completely true. Diversity applies to more than just race, sexual orientation, ethnic background, etc.
http://tinyurl.com/yhacgok
"We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by."
- Will Rogers
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Lazy lazy days
So I am in a lazy mode. Not sure why, but the weather is a good enough excuse for me. Of course, it's all about to end because I have a packed day ahead of me, but for right now it's nice to pretend that by being lazy I am not wreacking havoc on the rest of my day.
I am torn with letting someone go. My pride doesn't want to let it happen. I really wanted this to mean something. However, actions speak louder than words, and his actions are screaming at me right now. I think I will go ahead and do the date, but leave the ball in his court. I know he is about to go into a hugely busy period in his life, so it is only going to get worse from here. So I should let him go. Just do it, pull off the Band Aid. Ugh.
Or maybe I will just float with it for now and see what happens. But I hate the fade to black. I really do.
Dating sucks.
I am torn with letting someone go. My pride doesn't want to let it happen. I really wanted this to mean something. However, actions speak louder than words, and his actions are screaming at me right now. I think I will go ahead and do the date, but leave the ball in his court. I know he is about to go into a hugely busy period in his life, so it is only going to get worse from here. So I should let him go. Just do it, pull off the Band Aid. Ugh.
Or maybe I will just float with it for now and see what happens. But I hate the fade to black. I really do.
Dating sucks.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Online Dating
So I do online dating, as you already know. It works for me. Not sure why. It's not always easy, or fun, but I get to meet lots of people, expand my horizons, and always learn some interesting stuff about life, and myself, along the way. My latest account is set to expire soon (this month? next month? I don't even know), and I think I am going to take a breather after that again. Dating, whether on-line or in person, is a lot of work, and can be pretty draining. And although I haven't thrown in the towel or "got on the bench" yet, I have a few pieces of advice I would like to share with the men of the online dating world:
1. Guys, if you are going to wink at me, I will wink back IF you have a superstar profile. If your profile is way boring, short, or if I have any questions/doubts in any way about you, I will not show interest.
2. If you wink at me, and you get that wink back, if you follow up by sending a three word or otherwise lame e-mail, I will send back a comparable three word or lame e-mail. See where I am going with this? I am going to match your effort. If you don't put anymore effort out other than the minimum, we are not going anywhere.
3. It will take me about 2-3 e-mails before I go to a phone call. I generally like a phone conversation because I like to get a feel for you based on your voice. I have made one exception to this rule so far, and I have to admit it went well--I didn't meet a stalker, and lived to tell the tale. But I really do like the phone call.
4. Please get a life before you get on this site. I am not saying everyone who online dates has no life, but a lot of you guys don't. Have an activity. Have a passion. Do something fun, sporty, giving. Enjoy your job. If your life is crappy, take steps to fix it. If you are too embarassed to post a recent pic, clean up, fix up, lose weight, whatever you need to do to get yourself to a spot where you are cool with how you look.
That's all for now. Good luck, peeps, and remember, we date to have fun and meet people. I still hold onto the dream that it is possible.
1. Guys, if you are going to wink at me, I will wink back IF you have a superstar profile. If your profile is way boring, short, or if I have any questions/doubts in any way about you, I will not show interest.
2. If you wink at me, and you get that wink back, if you follow up by sending a three word or otherwise lame e-mail, I will send back a comparable three word or lame e-mail. See where I am going with this? I am going to match your effort. If you don't put anymore effort out other than the minimum, we are not going anywhere.
3. It will take me about 2-3 e-mails before I go to a phone call. I generally like a phone conversation because I like to get a feel for you based on your voice. I have made one exception to this rule so far, and I have to admit it went well--I didn't meet a stalker, and lived to tell the tale. But I really do like the phone call.
4. Please get a life before you get on this site. I am not saying everyone who online dates has no life, but a lot of you guys don't. Have an activity. Have a passion. Do something fun, sporty, giving. Enjoy your job. If your life is crappy, take steps to fix it. If you are too embarassed to post a recent pic, clean up, fix up, lose weight, whatever you need to do to get yourself to a spot where you are cool with how you look.
That's all for now. Good luck, peeps, and remember, we date to have fun and meet people. I still hold onto the dream that it is possible.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Fire in the HOLE!!!!!!!!!
So I wanted a snack at work. I did a race this past weekend, and the goodie bag contained something that you would expect in most half marathon race packs--microwave popcorn. Stupid? Yes. I mean, why put in Body Glide, band aids, Gatorade powder or Gu when you can give out microwave popcorn.
But I digress.
So I had this microwave popcorn in my desk drawer, and I wanted a snack, so I went to make my popcorn. Holy crow, I almost burned the building down. The stench of burnt popcorn is now stuck to my clothes.
Seriously, I was watching it the whole time. It was in there for less than 3 minutes, and the popping never stopped. I finally pulled the plug and decided to remove it from the microwave. The top part looked totally fine, but instead of steam coming out of the bag, there was smoke. Huh. What's up with that?
I waited about 2 minutes and the smoke didn't get any less. In fact, there were still random kernels popping. I ripped open the top of the bag and shook it a bit, and could see some burnt pieces. I then ripped the entire bag open, and below the pretty, fluffy popcorn on top was a ball of char that looks like what I imagine a burning meteor that hits the earth and lands in your yard would look like. A black, smoking ball, bumpy and scary. It was at least the size of a softball. I poured water on it, and it smoked and steamed like left over charcoal in your bbq.
Needless to say by now not only are my eyes watering, but burnt popcorn smoke has permeated the entire floor of my office building. I also have the smell of burnt popcorn on my hair, my clothes and my hands. Thank God there's no date tonight. I would hate be on someone else's blog as that burnt-popcorn-smelling girl. It's almost as bad as smelling like Doritos (like this girl I knew in the 6th grade).
But I digress.
So I had this microwave popcorn in my desk drawer, and I wanted a snack, so I went to make my popcorn. Holy crow, I almost burned the building down. The stench of burnt popcorn is now stuck to my clothes.
Seriously, I was watching it the whole time. It was in there for less than 3 minutes, and the popping never stopped. I finally pulled the plug and decided to remove it from the microwave. The top part looked totally fine, but instead of steam coming out of the bag, there was smoke. Huh. What's up with that?
I waited about 2 minutes and the smoke didn't get any less. In fact, there were still random kernels popping. I ripped open the top of the bag and shook it a bit, and could see some burnt pieces. I then ripped the entire bag open, and below the pretty, fluffy popcorn on top was a ball of char that looks like what I imagine a burning meteor that hits the earth and lands in your yard would look like. A black, smoking ball, bumpy and scary. It was at least the size of a softball. I poured water on it, and it smoked and steamed like left over charcoal in your bbq.
Needless to say by now not only are my eyes watering, but burnt popcorn smoke has permeated the entire floor of my office building. I also have the smell of burnt popcorn on my hair, my clothes and my hands. Thank God there's no date tonight. I would hate be on someone else's blog as that burnt-popcorn-smelling girl. It's almost as bad as smelling like Doritos (like this girl I knew in the 6th grade).
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Thanks to a Butthead
So, last night I cancelled my dentist appointment and went out for some bevvies with my SI. SI has an ex that has been the hugest Butthead in America, and he made a timely reappearance on her radar over the weekend, so we went out for drinks. Good excuse to catch up, and maybe do some boy watching at watering hole where the service stinks but the odds are good. I did me a little walk to get up there, which sucked in 90 degrees heat, 80 percent humidity, and 600,000 tourists on the same sidewalk as me. I lasted about 2.5 miles before I hit the subway (which, usually once you get past the general pee smell in the station, the cars are often delightfully cool). We had our drinks, some food, and miserable service, and decided to find another location--particularly because we were outside and couldn't take it anymore.
We go to bar two (very important on a Monday night, folks, gotta support the economy) and some random guy (forever known as Country Club) sits down next to me. After some prodding from SI, and some strategic bar menu placement while he went to the bathroom (put the menu closer to him so I have to ask him to look at it, therefore inviting conversation and fodder--I know, I am as slick as a fifth grader--ladies watch your men!), we strike up a conversation. SI graciously bows out after an hour (God love her, great wingman that she is) (oh, and it's also flipping Monday night and it's 10 PM) and I continue to chat it up with Country Club.
Our opening conversation involved dating horror stories. Now I clearly had my story with Fish Boy still fresh from Sunday, and happily shared it. But I have to say Country Club's may have been worse. See, CC is from Florida, and was spending time out on Long Island for vacation. He met this chick who lives out there when she was in Florida a few months back, and apparently they had been planning on meeting up and spending a few days together out on Block Island or Montauk or something like that--had done the phone/e-mail thing, made plans, blah blah blah. They meet up at a bar, and it turns out when she meets him, she made a mistake. The whole time they were talking long distance, she thought he was someone else. Not only does she admit this, but apparently stumbles all over it, and of course, CC is like WTF? He says she nice and hot, but just nothing going on upstairs. Needless to say they have dinner, have a nice time, and go their separate ways. Instead of staying out on the Island, CC decides to head into the city for a few days (hence us meeting him at the random bar). Apparently the chick has been calling all day apologizing and trying to get together, and CC is totally ignoring her.
What a sucky story! I mean, no matter how dumb you are, you can't fake it that this is the guy the whole time you were talking to, and then either fake an illness or an emergency? My guess would be that CC didn't come up here just for her, but it was probably a part of it. Anywho, clearly crappy dates can go both ways--I actually felt the need to apologize on behalf of all women to CC, because I thought that stunk. He was apologizing for Fish Boy, but I told him one guy not having a personality or the ability to hold a conversation was not indicitive of the entire male species, and therefore the apology was not necessary (but definitely appreciated).
Lesson? Someone's crappy date can make my already great evening turn into a fantastic one. I had a great time talking with CC for hours, and we exchanged contact info. So, shout out to the dumb lady on Long Island--thanks for being an idiot and letting me look good!
Oh, and I actually have something nice to say to Butthead. Thanks to you being an idiot, I had a great night.
We go to bar two (very important on a Monday night, folks, gotta support the economy) and some random guy (forever known as Country Club) sits down next to me. After some prodding from SI, and some strategic bar menu placement while he went to the bathroom (put the menu closer to him so I have to ask him to look at it, therefore inviting conversation and fodder--I know, I am as slick as a fifth grader--ladies watch your men!), we strike up a conversation. SI graciously bows out after an hour (God love her, great wingman that she is) (oh, and it's also flipping Monday night and it's 10 PM) and I continue to chat it up with Country Club.
Our opening conversation involved dating horror stories. Now I clearly had my story with Fish Boy still fresh from Sunday, and happily shared it. But I have to say Country Club's may have been worse. See, CC is from Florida, and was spending time out on Long Island for vacation. He met this chick who lives out there when she was in Florida a few months back, and apparently they had been planning on meeting up and spending a few days together out on Block Island or Montauk or something like that--had done the phone/e-mail thing, made plans, blah blah blah. They meet up at a bar, and it turns out when she meets him, she made a mistake. The whole time they were talking long distance, she thought he was someone else. Not only does she admit this, but apparently stumbles all over it, and of course, CC is like WTF? He says she nice and hot, but just nothing going on upstairs. Needless to say they have dinner, have a nice time, and go their separate ways. Instead of staying out on the Island, CC decides to head into the city for a few days (hence us meeting him at the random bar). Apparently the chick has been calling all day apologizing and trying to get together, and CC is totally ignoring her.
What a sucky story! I mean, no matter how dumb you are, you can't fake it that this is the guy the whole time you were talking to, and then either fake an illness or an emergency? My guess would be that CC didn't come up here just for her, but it was probably a part of it. Anywho, clearly crappy dates can go both ways--I actually felt the need to apologize on behalf of all women to CC, because I thought that stunk. He was apologizing for Fish Boy, but I told him one guy not having a personality or the ability to hold a conversation was not indicitive of the entire male species, and therefore the apology was not necessary (but definitely appreciated).
Lesson? Someone's crappy date can make my already great evening turn into a fantastic one. I had a great time talking with CC for hours, and we exchanged contact info. So, shout out to the dumb lady on Long Island--thanks for being an idiot and letting me look good!
Oh, and I actually have something nice to say to Butthead. Thanks to you being an idiot, I had a great night.
Monday, August 17, 2009
There's race reports, so why not date reports?
OK, some highlights form last night's excursion into dating. I have to admit that I have a smoking intuition, and for the most part, can weed out people I am not compatible with over the phone. So I am not sure if I just decided to take a chance with this guy, or if the "even a blind squirrel will eventually get a nut" theory comes into play. Let's just say the guy was very nice, but definitely not for me. Plus I don't think he smiled once the whole night--except when talking about his car. THere's a lot more I could add to this date report, but I think this glimpse at our conversation may be all you need to know.
Anything in brackets is something I physically did. Anything in parenthesis is my inner monologue:
BG (Boring Guy): So, do you like what I did (points to his head)?
McFunski: Um, I am guessing you shave your head since it's bald, right?
BG: Yeah.
McFunski: Oh, it's nice.
BG: But do you think it looks good?
McFunski: Well, it looks fine, but you know, to be honest, I have no point of reference. I have never seen you with hair.
BG: Yeah.
McFunski: So that's new for you? How long have you been shaving it.
BG: About seven years now.
McFunski: Oh.
BG: But do you think it compliments the shape of my head?
McFunski: Um, it's very nice.
Long pause.
McFunski: So what's there to do on Staten Island?
BG: Nothing. I don't hang out there.
McFunski: So where do you hang out?
BG: I usually go to (insert random Jersey town name here) to hang out with my old friends.
McFunski: That's cool. You guys go to concerts and stuff? See any good shows lately?
BG: No.
Long pause.
McFunski: When you go to Florida to visit your family, have you ever seen that wakeboarding lake that have in Kissimmee?
BG: No.
McFunski: Oh, well it really looks like fun.
BG: Yeah, I'd like to try that.
McFunski: You say you go to Disney a lot, have you ever been to the Food and Wine Festival?
BG: No.
McFunski: Oh, it's cool, you should check it out. How about the Beer Festival at Universal? That's a great time!
BG: No
McFunski: Oh. Um. What exactly do you do when you go to Florida?
BG: Hang out with my niece and nephew.
Long pause.
BG: So we're about the same age, right?
McFunski: Yes, we're both 37.
BG: Yeah! Me too.
McFunski: [Insert blank stare] Yeah, right. I am guessing you graduated high school in 1990 like me, right?
BG: Yes.
Long pause.
McFunski: So you're from NJ, right?
BG: Yeah. And you're from NY?
McFunski: Well, technically, yes. But like I said I moved out when I was 10 (not to mention you just picked me up in Jersey, you fricking idiot), went to NW NJ, and then in high school went to Florida.
BG: Oh, so you graduated from high school in NY?
McFunski: Um, well, no. Unless I was Doogie Houser, and I graduated at 10. So that's cool, that would make me 29! Sweet!
BG: Huh?
McFunski: Never mind, no, I graduated high school in Florida.
BG: oh.
Long pause.
McFunski: So how long have you been a police officer?
BG: About 7 years and one month. I have 11 years and 11 months until retirement!
McFunski: Oh, that's cool (wait, maybe he's perking up! He strung together more than 5 words! )
BG: Yeah, and I already know what I want to do when I retire!
McFunski: How cool, what do you want to do?
BG: I want to move to Florida and work for Walt Disney World
McFunski: (feels the clouds of doom already surrounding this conversation) That sure sounds like it would be fun! Is there anything in particular you want to do for Disney?
[wait for it!]
BG: I want to either drive the monorail or one of the busses that take you to your car!
McFunski: [insert look of shock and horror] Oh. Wow. That sounds great. But where do you get experience as a monorail captain? I mean, even the one at the Orlando airport is automated, right?
BG: Yeah, that's a concern. What if they automate them in the next 12 years.
McFunski: Yeah, wow, that would be tough. [I seriously tried not to roll my eyes, I swear]
Long pause.
BG: So you're from NY?
McFunski: [not even trying to hold back the eye roll now] Yes. Fine. I am from NY.
Long pause.
Waiter: Would you like an appetizer.
BG: Yes, we'll take the (insert random food here) and I would like a bowl of the hot and sour soup.
Waiter: Coming right up [walks away]
BG: [looks at me] I should have ordered a cup, not a bowl.
McFunski: well, the waiter's right there, just grab him and change it.
BG: No. It's OK. But I should have ordered a cup.
McFunski: well, whatever you want.
Long pause.
Food runner: Here's your cup of hot and sour soup, sir!
BG: Is this a cup or a bowl?
Food runner: It's a cup.
BG: Well, I ordered a bowl.
Food runner (picks up soup): I'm sorry about that. The ticket said cup, I will get you the right size right away.
BG: You know what? Don't worry about it, I'll make due and just keep the cup.
Food runner: Are you sure? It's no problem to change it.
BG: No, I guess I'll take the cup.
McFunski: [eyes rolling, banging her head on table]
Long pause as McFunski resumes consciousness after knocking herself out on the table.
Anything in brackets is something I physically did. Anything in parenthesis is my inner monologue:
BG (Boring Guy): So, do you like what I did (points to his head)?
McFunski: Um, I am guessing you shave your head since it's bald, right?
BG: Yeah.
McFunski: Oh, it's nice.
BG: But do you think it looks good?
McFunski: Well, it looks fine, but you know, to be honest, I have no point of reference. I have never seen you with hair.
BG: Yeah.
McFunski: So that's new for you? How long have you been shaving it.
BG: About seven years now.
McFunski: Oh.
BG: But do you think it compliments the shape of my head?
McFunski: Um, it's very nice.
Long pause.
McFunski: So what's there to do on Staten Island?
BG: Nothing. I don't hang out there.
McFunski: So where do you hang out?
BG: I usually go to (insert random Jersey town name here) to hang out with my old friends.
McFunski: That's cool. You guys go to concerts and stuff? See any good shows lately?
BG: No.
Long pause.
McFunski: When you go to Florida to visit your family, have you ever seen that wakeboarding lake that have in Kissimmee?
BG: No.
McFunski: Oh, well it really looks like fun.
BG: Yeah, I'd like to try that.
McFunski: You say you go to Disney a lot, have you ever been to the Food and Wine Festival?
BG: No.
McFunski: Oh, it's cool, you should check it out. How about the Beer Festival at Universal? That's a great time!
BG: No
McFunski: Oh. Um. What exactly do you do when you go to Florida?
BG: Hang out with my niece and nephew.
Long pause.
BG: So we're about the same age, right?
McFunski: Yes, we're both 37.
BG: Yeah! Me too.
McFunski: [Insert blank stare] Yeah, right. I am guessing you graduated high school in 1990 like me, right?
BG: Yes.
Long pause.
McFunski: So you're from NJ, right?
BG: Yeah. And you're from NY?
McFunski: Well, technically, yes. But like I said I moved out when I was 10 (not to mention you just picked me up in Jersey, you fricking idiot), went to NW NJ, and then in high school went to Florida.
BG: Oh, so you graduated from high school in NY?
McFunski: Um, well, no. Unless I was Doogie Houser, and I graduated at 10. So that's cool, that would make me 29! Sweet!
BG: Huh?
McFunski: Never mind, no, I graduated high school in Florida.
BG: oh.
Long pause.
McFunski: So how long have you been a police officer?
BG: About 7 years and one month. I have 11 years and 11 months until retirement!
McFunski: Oh, that's cool (wait, maybe he's perking up! He strung together more than 5 words! )
BG: Yeah, and I already know what I want to do when I retire!
McFunski: How cool, what do you want to do?
BG: I want to move to Florida and work for Walt Disney World
McFunski: (feels the clouds of doom already surrounding this conversation) That sure sounds like it would be fun! Is there anything in particular you want to do for Disney?
[wait for it!]
BG: I want to either drive the monorail or one of the busses that take you to your car!
McFunski: [insert look of shock and horror] Oh. Wow. That sounds great. But where do you get experience as a monorail captain? I mean, even the one at the Orlando airport is automated, right?
BG: Yeah, that's a concern. What if they automate them in the next 12 years.
McFunski: Yeah, wow, that would be tough. [I seriously tried not to roll my eyes, I swear]
Long pause.
BG: So you're from NY?
McFunski: [not even trying to hold back the eye roll now] Yes. Fine. I am from NY.
Long pause.
Waiter: Would you like an appetizer.
BG: Yes, we'll take the (insert random food here) and I would like a bowl of the hot and sour soup.
Waiter: Coming right up [walks away]
BG: [looks at me] I should have ordered a cup, not a bowl.
McFunski: well, the waiter's right there, just grab him and change it.
BG: No. It's OK. But I should have ordered a cup.
McFunski: well, whatever you want.
Long pause.
Food runner: Here's your cup of hot and sour soup, sir!
BG: Is this a cup or a bowl?
Food runner: It's a cup.
BG: Well, I ordered a bowl.
Food runner (picks up soup): I'm sorry about that. The ticket said cup, I will get you the right size right away.
BG: You know what? Don't worry about it, I'll make due and just keep the cup.
Food runner: Are you sure? It's no problem to change it.
BG: No, I guess I'll take the cup.
McFunski: [eyes rolling, banging her head on table]
Long pause as McFunski resumes consciousness after knocking herself out on the table.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Need a job? Hate runners? Look no further!
So, after WAY too many run ins, nastiness, and all around attitudes from the majority of the NYRR employees I deal with, I have decided that it is a job requirement that you have an underlying resentment to all runners if you work for them. I have no idea if this stems from the fact that most people there want to run better and can't anymore, or if you take a bunch of people with a shared passion (running), check their resumes to ensure they have never had any customer service experience, and then severely underpay and overwork them to create this cauldron of negativity that is displayed at most of their events. Today, for example, I called to find out if the NYC Half Marathon (which I just found out is not being sponsored by Nike) will have technical or cotton t-shirts, and if there are medals. This info is not on their website (which I scoured for about 20 minutes). After calling twice, and waiting on hold for 10 minutes, the woman told me she would not know until the event. I asked her how they could possibly not know this? Don't you have to order these items in advance (mind you the event is next weekend)?
Seriously, folks, just try to be nice for once. I got it--you hate your job. But you choose to work there. I just want a little bit of common courtesy, or maybe just a little less hatred.
Thanks!
Seriously, folks, just try to be nice for once. I got it--you hate your job. But you choose to work there. I just want a little bit of common courtesy, or maybe just a little less hatred.
Thanks!
Monday, July 20, 2009
The first bike ride
Um, yeah. It didn't go so well. Here's the story:
So I decided it would be a good idea to take a bike ride from Bayonne to meet my aunt and uncle, who were visiting Staten Island. In theory it looked good--it would be a little over 14 miles each way, I was familiar with the route from walking a few years back, and it involved a nice incline/decline on the bridge. The weather was great, I could take what I needed in my back pack, and it would be a great way to start my bike training. I figured, based on my pace on the stationary bike at the gym, it would take about an hour.
Wow. Was I wrong.
First of all, there was construction in Bayonne, and I wound up tacking on a few extra miles there as I got a bit mixed up. Plus I didn't quite remember where the bridge enterance was. But, I found it, and all was well. The bridge was good, I did really good on it (still trying to figure out my gears on the bike, by the way). And then I hit Staten Island.
And here, my friends, it gets sticky. I didn't take into account traffic (lots and lots of traffic), a lack of shoulder on the roads in many spots, a lack of sidewalk in others, and a lack of both in many areas. Riding down Richmond Avenue could almost be considered a suicidal event. I forgot just how fast people drive on that road. Plus not to mention all the cross streets, active drive ways, and people out for a stroll. Oh, and did I mention that there were hills? Never huge, but also never ending. Up after down after up after down. It took me about two hours to get to my destination. Definitely not what I was planning. And by about an hour an a half, my butt hurt so bad I wanted to cry. And I still had to get home.
It was a little better on the way home (I now knew the route and could judge a little better). The first hour on the bike was torture on my butt, but it got a bit better (numb maybe?). It only took me 1 hour and 38 minutes (not that I was counting) to get back. When I got home that was an average of like 7.5 MPH. Totally not what I was thinking.
So what did I learn? I can bike a long distance without training, but it won't be pretty. I need to train in a much lower traffic area. And I need a lot of work on the bike.
Oh, lordy. I think I just may die at my tri.
So I decided it would be a good idea to take a bike ride from Bayonne to meet my aunt and uncle, who were visiting Staten Island. In theory it looked good--it would be a little over 14 miles each way, I was familiar with the route from walking a few years back, and it involved a nice incline/decline on the bridge. The weather was great, I could take what I needed in my back pack, and it would be a great way to start my bike training. I figured, based on my pace on the stationary bike at the gym, it would take about an hour.
Wow. Was I wrong.
First of all, there was construction in Bayonne, and I wound up tacking on a few extra miles there as I got a bit mixed up. Plus I didn't quite remember where the bridge enterance was. But, I found it, and all was well. The bridge was good, I did really good on it (still trying to figure out my gears on the bike, by the way). And then I hit Staten Island.
And here, my friends, it gets sticky. I didn't take into account traffic (lots and lots of traffic), a lack of shoulder on the roads in many spots, a lack of sidewalk in others, and a lack of both in many areas. Riding down Richmond Avenue could almost be considered a suicidal event. I forgot just how fast people drive on that road. Plus not to mention all the cross streets, active drive ways, and people out for a stroll. Oh, and did I mention that there were hills? Never huge, but also never ending. Up after down after up after down. It took me about two hours to get to my destination. Definitely not what I was planning. And by about an hour an a half, my butt hurt so bad I wanted to cry. And I still had to get home.
It was a little better on the way home (I now knew the route and could judge a little better). The first hour on the bike was torture on my butt, but it got a bit better (numb maybe?). It only took me 1 hour and 38 minutes (not that I was counting) to get back. When I got home that was an average of like 7.5 MPH. Totally not what I was thinking.
So what did I learn? I can bike a long distance without training, but it won't be pretty. I need to train in a much lower traffic area. And I need a lot of work on the bike.
Oh, lordy. I think I just may die at my tri.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Talking Smack--Put up or shut up!
So I have been talking smack for awhile about doing a sprint triathlon. I finally decided to bite the bullet and sign up for a race this weekend. It's a warm fuzzy one, women only, in Vermont. I am pretty excited about it.
Yesterday I went on my first training swim. Few points to note: 1. I don't swim. 2. I can float, and move in the water, but my signature move is currently the doggie paddle. 3. I don't enjoy the sensation of water in my nose. Or my ears. 4. I did two laps in the pool in Colorado this past winter on my vacation and almost died. 5. two years ago I swam at the gym at Rutgers once and almost died. 6. I was hoping my running/cardio ability would somehow make swimming so much better this time. 7. I have no clue how to do a real swim stroke, and no clue how to do the head in the water, turn to breath thing.
So, I went to the pool and jumped on in. Um, wow. It was rough. Apparently I had all kinds of issues--forgetting to kick (how does that happen?), swallowing gallons of nasty pool water, having a hard time staying in my half of the lane, thinking for the first time in a long time I am actually signing up for an activity that I could die while doing it, etc. Humbling? Yes. Motivating? Not sure. But I am committed and am going to give it a try.
Wish me luck, blog world!
Yesterday I went on my first training swim. Few points to note: 1. I don't swim. 2. I can float, and move in the water, but my signature move is currently the doggie paddle. 3. I don't enjoy the sensation of water in my nose. Or my ears. 4. I did two laps in the pool in Colorado this past winter on my vacation and almost died. 5. two years ago I swam at the gym at Rutgers once and almost died. 6. I was hoping my running/cardio ability would somehow make swimming so much better this time. 7. I have no clue how to do a real swim stroke, and no clue how to do the head in the water, turn to breath thing.
So, I went to the pool and jumped on in. Um, wow. It was rough. Apparently I had all kinds of issues--forgetting to kick (how does that happen?), swallowing gallons of nasty pool water, having a hard time staying in my half of the lane, thinking for the first time in a long time I am actually signing up for an activity that I could die while doing it, etc. Humbling? Yes. Motivating? Not sure. But I am committed and am going to give it a try.
Wish me luck, blog world!
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Your Match.com Profile of the Day
well this is my first time doing this [VIRGIN ALERT! VIRGIN ALERT!] so i hope i do this right [um, yeah, good luck with that] well i am hopping [on one foot? up and down?] to find an honest caring girl [aren't girls under 18? perv] somebody that wants to do thing toghther who like sports and go to games sometimes and also like nascar like all types of music country, rock, oldeies [wha?], easy listing irish music [like easy listing on Craig's list? Or is the Irish music easy listening?] and so on excpet for rap and heavy meatall [what's wrong with meat?] i like the METS ISLANDERS JETS [this would be why I can't route for these teams] dosn't bother me what team you like [but it bothers me that you can't flipping spell] i like to shop [seriously? Shop? Like at cute little boutiques in Soho? Please.] travel cook sit around [wow! hey, guys, look, someone who will sit around with me! Thank God because all those other guys who have real lives and activities bore me! Do you think he has a special chair in which he does all this sitting around in?] and wacth tv or a movie [wow. unique. original] like to hang out with my brothers and play cards like to try things [what kinds of things are you trying with your brothers? Creepy!] i belong to the fre department [the free department? Like in a yard sale when, on Sunday afternoon, you give up, stick a free sign on your s*&% and leave it outside?] and during the summer i race to [do you race to the couch so you can sit around, play cards, and "try things" with your brothers?] don't really like te bar or the clubs but i would go if we go in a group [oh, here we go, has to be attended, can't fly solo] i am hoping to find someone were we could talk to each other [where we could talk to each other?] and say thing to each other [correct me if I am wrong, but if you are talking to each other, don't you say stuff to each other?] and to help each other out on what every is bothering each other who will listen [no one is listening dude. No one. Because you have no idea how to construct a coherent thought!]
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
A HELL Date contribution from my friend!
Please note no one was harmed during this story, except for my friend's ego and the several hours that she had to waste.
Last night I went on a date to a mets game. Now I am a Met Lover and even though it was a Monday night, and I hate Monday night dates, I thought what the hell. The guy said we would be seated in the promenade. I did not realize that “promenade” is just a nice word for the upper upper deck. Sorry to seem like a snob but the mezzanine would have been nice…. Anyhoo, convo is flowing and all is good til about the 3rd inning, when he starts telling me the story about how his ex called him recently and gave him some “disturbing” news. When I asked WHAT!? He said he could not say bc it was embarassing, and just that she had left him a “Parting Gift”. I could only imagine what that parting gift could be!! It was the longest worst game ever and the Mets are getting killed. The boy insists on staying until the 9th inning. C’mon it was like 10-2 and the mets had scattered maybe 3 hits and remember its Monday. So we FINALLY leave and we couldn’t find his car after the game. Ugh. We finally find it and I realize the reason we could not find it all this time is because it looks like this little sh1tbox attached and it was too small to see between the other cars. I then thought I was going to live my final moments on the BQE as he was doing about 90 in this piece of crap. Sigh.
Yesterday's fodder
Yesterday I had two: Boyfriend A and Boyfriend B. A required comments (again in brackets). B needed no assistance from me. Enjoy!
Potential Boyfriend A:
I love to laugh and have fun.[so far so good!] I am a flirt and never meet a stranger but once I am committed I am very loyal.[and he lost me] I am not into games, well too old for that. I am a non-smoker so if that bothers you then lets not waste our time. [yes, yes, that's it! It's not because you are slaughtering the English language or that your posting is not making sense, it deeply disturbs me that you don't smoke. I was going to try and convert you into a smoker, but thanks for letting me know up front I should not waste my time on that] I love to romance and share my emotions, but it won't be because of someone else, it will be because I want to. I like spending time with someone i love and cherish my pet because I like pets. [so are you comparing me to your dog? Because I am not finding this a great way "to romance and share your emotions"] I like the water whether it is the beach or a lake but the beach is preferable because I go there all alone [ you can go to the beach alone but must be attended at a lake?] and the serene environment relaxes me. I like live bands but not too crazy about it and I really love to share my emotions and feelings its not the best to always hide it or you get down with it [like getting jiggy with it? that kind of get down with it?] as well. I am talented and ambitious and also hard working because life has not been fair to me from the start and I am hoping to reshape my life the man I have always loved to be [wow. Good luck to you with that]
Potential Boyfriend B
Headline:
SHE !, dont have to be PERFECT ! WELL! No body is perfect.Just RIGTH !.. BUT !, SHE must love dogs!! Any way! Do U like the black wig?
LOVE to LOVE!!! and LOVE to be LOVED!!!!,,,I consider myself a regular single guy, I work on cars, Diesel trucks, Bio Diesel,,motorbikes,,,,automotive machine shop, custom work, restoration, etc,,...Man and boys !!!,,...WHAT IS The diference???,,,,,,,,,the price and size of them toys!!!!...LOL...I love the ocean, nigth dive ,fishing,,camping, COOK OUT,(with natural firewood),bum fires, hiking, etc,,,LOVE TO EXPLORE THE NATURE!!!,,,,looking for friend first,,...,and time will tell US,,, what to DO!!!... ,,How ever,,In life ,, is A RULE for Sucess,,rule #1 ,,know what U know..and know, what U dont KNOW!!,, learn ,,,what U dont know,,,and, the SOONER!!,,the BETTER!!,,Now,,What i know, that ...LIFE IS TOOoooo SHORT!!!,,and with the global changes ,(economy, climate, etc,),just in CASE!!,,better get ready for the worst !!!. ... IF you agree with my,,,,,LETS TALK STORY!!!!!! Questions??,,,feel free to ask!!!,,,,,,,Sergio Ps..Soon,,I will post more pics!!!!
for fun:
ANYTHING OUT DOORS!,,The ocean !,Sunsets,swiming,Nigth diving,camping,hiking,cooking BBQ,,fly small planes,,cruise around the big rock,by motorcicle or 4x4,restoring a sail boat...and off course!,, play,hike through the nature with the dogies
my job:
C. I. A.!!! K. G. B.!!,,.......Just kidding!!... For real !!.. Automotive machine shop,,, and I. R. S. !!! (import repair specialist) ..now learning about construction,, masonery,carpentry ,remodeling,etc..
my ethnicity:
A big monkey from south America!!..1/2 Russian..1/2 Spanish!!
my education:
9 years at technical institute,,basics for electro mechanic principals,dinamics, internal cobustion engines,machine shop tooling,etc,
favorite hot spots:
For a first date?.A cofee shop,or sunset diner,,,For a MINI Vacation(A few days).camping.fishing.diving,,at the hiden beaches,parks,Waipio valley,etc, Sailing!!!, visit the other islands !! , for a REAL VACATION!.Europe,Egypt and South America
favorite things:
FOOD, BBQ,ice cream,almost anything!Color?Red and blue ,Hobbies?!,auto racing,,and 4x4 off roads..!,Raining outside?Play/dance under the rain! if is cold,next to the fire place.watch a movie,music?jaz.country, classic, mix,all depends on the day
last read:
newspapers..sports and time magazines ,..Now learning about the Mayan calender,,,December 2012 !!?Books on alternative clean energy,......hydroelectric,.solars,wind mills,etc,
Potential Boyfriend A:
I love to laugh and have fun.[so far so good!] I am a flirt and never meet a stranger but once I am committed I am very loyal.[and he lost me] I am not into games, well too old for that. I am a non-smoker so if that bothers you then lets not waste our time. [yes, yes, that's it! It's not because you are slaughtering the English language or that your posting is not making sense, it deeply disturbs me that you don't smoke. I was going to try and convert you into a smoker, but thanks for letting me know up front I should not waste my time on that] I love to romance and share my emotions, but it won't be because of someone else, it will be because I want to. I like spending time with someone i love and cherish my pet because I like pets. [so are you comparing me to your dog? Because I am not finding this a great way "to romance and share your emotions"] I like the water whether it is the beach or a lake but the beach is preferable because I go there all alone [ you can go to the beach alone but must be attended at a lake?] and the serene environment relaxes me. I like live bands but not too crazy about it and I really love to share my emotions and feelings its not the best to always hide it or you get down with it [like getting jiggy with it? that kind of get down with it?] as well. I am talented and ambitious and also hard working because life has not been fair to me from the start and I am hoping to reshape my life the man I have always loved to be [wow. Good luck to you with that]
Potential Boyfriend B
Headline:
SHE !, dont have to be PERFECT ! WELL! No body is perfect.Just RIGTH !.. BUT !, SHE must love dogs!! Any way! Do U like the black wig?
LOVE to LOVE!!! and LOVE to be LOVED!!!!,,,I consider myself a regular single guy, I work on cars, Diesel trucks, Bio Diesel,,motorbikes,,,,automotive machine shop, custom work, restoration, etc,,...Man and boys !!!,,...WHAT IS The diference???,,,,,,,,,the price and size of them toys!!!!...LOL...I love the ocean, nigth dive ,fishing,,camping, COOK OUT,(with natural firewood),bum fires, hiking, etc,,,LOVE TO EXPLORE THE NATURE!!!,,,,looking for friend first,,...,and time will tell US,,, what to DO!!!... ,,How ever,,In life ,, is A RULE for Sucess,,rule #1 ,,know what U know..and know, what U dont KNOW!!,, learn ,,,what U dont know,,,and, the SOONER!!,,the BETTER!!,,Now,,What i know, that ...LIFE IS TOOoooo SHORT!!!,,and with the global changes ,(economy, climate, etc,),just in CASE!!,,better get ready for the worst !!!. ... IF you agree with my,,,,,LETS TALK STORY!!!!!! Questions??,,,feel free to ask!!!,,,,,,,Sergio Ps..Soon,,I will post more pics!!!!
for fun:
ANYTHING OUT DOORS!,,The ocean !,Sunsets,swiming,Nigth diving,camping,hiking,cooking BBQ,,fly small planes,,cruise around the big rock,by motorcicle or 4x4,restoring a sail boat...and off course!,, play,hike through the nature with the dogies
my job:
C. I. A.!!! K. G. B.!!,,.......Just kidding!!... For real !!.. Automotive machine shop,,, and I. R. S. !!! (import repair specialist) ..now learning about construction,, masonery,carpentry ,remodeling,etc..
my ethnicity:
A big monkey from south America!!..1/2 Russian..1/2 Spanish!!
my education:
9 years at technical institute,,basics for electro mechanic principals,dinamics, internal cobustion engines,machine shop tooling,etc,
favorite hot spots:
For a first date?.A cofee shop,or sunset diner,,,For a MINI Vacation(A few days).camping.fishing.diving,,at the hiden beaches,parks,Waipio valley,etc, Sailing!!!, visit the other islands !! , for a REAL VACATION!.Europe,Egypt and South America
favorite things:
FOOD, BBQ,ice cream,almost anything!Color?Red and blue ,Hobbies?!,auto racing,,and 4x4 off roads..!,Raining outside?Play/dance under the rain! if is cold,next to the fire place.watch a movie,music?jaz.country, classic, mix,all depends on the day
last read:
newspapers..sports and time magazines ,..Now learning about the Mayan calender,,,December 2012 !!?Books on alternative clean energy,......hydroelectric,.solars,wind mills,etc,
Your Match.com profile of the day
So, in order to keep my sanity throughout this dating phase I am on, I have decided to poke fun at the other single souls suffering alongside me and comment on their Match.com postings. I won't use anything like user name or location so hopefully I am "protecting" their identity, but I am hoping this will be enjoyed by many!
Info in brackets are my comments. I have named this posting: Bitter, party of one? Bitter, your table is now available!
I'd like to be married within a few years. [admirable goal, thanks for telling me upfront] I'm not a Donald Trump. [meaning you don't have crazy dead cat hair, or you look/act like him a lot and people get all confused?]
If you're looking for an intelligent conversation I'm here. [um, yeah. So far the cunning linguist, you are not] If you're looking for someone with lots of money to always pick up the tab then Match allows you to search elsewhere for that criteria. [oh, it means you are a cheap b*a*s*t*ard, I get it!]
I'm an Irish-American and that's a big part of my life. Many of my interests center on that fact. You don't need to be Irish or interested in Ireland but you should know that bit about me! [think he does the River Dance? Or decorates his apartment with creepy leprechauns?]
I think exercising and staying healthy are key ingredients to a happy life. [that's weird, you sound bitter and angry, not happy] I believe a husband and wife stay healthy for each other so they can be around for a long time. [wow, it's only been about five minutes and I am ready to stop running, grab some Ben and Jerry's and head for death just to get away from your profile and experience joy again] It's not simply a matter of staying thin. A thin person can be unhealthy and someone with a few extra pounds can be in great shape. It's important to have some goals in common.[are you sure you don't mean activities or interests?] I love seeing couples jogging together in the morning or doing other things together.[yep, dumb a*s*s meant activities or interests] Together time shouldn't only be "going out" to stare at a movie screen but also food shopping, cooking, cleaning, and excercise. [think he knows he can't spell exercise?] [perfect! I am so excited to spend time with you this weekend washing the windows! Maybe we can go to BJ's and hit "feeding time"! Oh, wait, no, that would make me fat and you would hate me. Wow, this is tough] Together time can include everything. [great, clingy boy, can't wait!]
That's not to say that we shouldn't also be individuals with our own friends! [phew! I am going to need to take a break and have fun after all those wild and crazy "goals" we share!]
Deal Breakers:
smoking
obesity
Damsells in distress
"Walking trauma victims" [why's he gotta hate on when I need to go the ER?]
Psych problems so severe that they require medication [meaning I have a prescription and take it so I can act and function like a human, or would you rather I go undiagnosed and just kill myself after hanging with you because you are so bitter?]
While pseudo-friendship can be an important start to a relationship it can also abort it. It's easy to get stuck in the friend zone and the relationship can never get out of it (fantasy TV shows to the contrary). [what in the heck TV shows does this guy watch? I think he needs to get off the couch] There are many good websites devoted to helping people find platonic friends. [uh, oh. Someone's been burned!]
I don't like dating games or "the rules". There are many smooth operators out there and I am not one of them.[really? I am so swept off my feet right now by your optimism and zest for life, I thought you were Sade] If someone tells me something I tend to believe them. [OK, how about this--you need therapy. Seriously. Go get it]
I admire women who are willing to stand on their own two feet. [oh, darn, we won't be a good match. I like to spend most of my time on my back] It's nice to find someone who chooses to be with me because she wants to be and not because she needs "someone". [I actually would question this woman. I think she is with him because she hates herself, but whatever] We're not placeholders until something better comes along. [well, actually, you are]
I should probably state now that I'm a big believer in equality between the sexes. My older brothers grew up changing my diapers, cleaning, and sewing. Mom mowed the lawn and painted the house. I don't see women as wilting flowers. [but rather as work mules who must prove their worth attaining my goals of you painting the house]
Have a good day! [and ends on a happy note. Go figure]
Info in brackets are my comments. I have named this posting: Bitter, party of one? Bitter, your table is now available!
I'd like to be married within a few years. [admirable goal, thanks for telling me upfront] I'm not a Donald Trump. [meaning you don't have crazy dead cat hair, or you look/act like him a lot and people get all confused?]
If you're looking for an intelligent conversation I'm here. [um, yeah. So far the cunning linguist, you are not] If you're looking for someone with lots of money to always pick up the tab then Match allows you to search elsewhere for that criteria. [oh, it means you are a cheap b*a*s*t*ard, I get it!]
I'm an Irish-American and that's a big part of my life. Many of my interests center on that fact. You don't need to be Irish or interested in Ireland but you should know that bit about me! [think he does the River Dance? Or decorates his apartment with creepy leprechauns?]
I think exercising and staying healthy are key ingredients to a happy life. [that's weird, you sound bitter and angry, not happy] I believe a husband and wife stay healthy for each other so they can be around for a long time. [wow, it's only been about five minutes and I am ready to stop running, grab some Ben and Jerry's and head for death just to get away from your profile and experience joy again] It's not simply a matter of staying thin. A thin person can be unhealthy and someone with a few extra pounds can be in great shape. It's important to have some goals in common.[are you sure you don't mean activities or interests?] I love seeing couples jogging together in the morning or doing other things together.[yep, dumb a*s*s meant activities or interests] Together time shouldn't only be "going out" to stare at a movie screen but also food shopping, cooking, cleaning, and excercise. [think he knows he can't spell exercise?] [perfect! I am so excited to spend time with you this weekend washing the windows! Maybe we can go to BJ's and hit "feeding time"! Oh, wait, no, that would make me fat and you would hate me. Wow, this is tough] Together time can include everything. [great, clingy boy, can't wait!]
That's not to say that we shouldn't also be individuals with our own friends! [phew! I am going to need to take a break and have fun after all those wild and crazy "goals" we share!]
Deal Breakers:
smoking
obesity
Damsells in distress
"Walking trauma victims" [why's he gotta hate on when I need to go the ER?]
Psych problems so severe that they require medication [meaning I have a prescription and take it so I can act and function like a human, or would you rather I go undiagnosed and just kill myself after hanging with you because you are so bitter?]
While pseudo-friendship can be an important start to a relationship it can also abort it. It's easy to get stuck in the friend zone and the relationship can never get out of it (fantasy TV shows to the contrary). [what in the heck TV shows does this guy watch? I think he needs to get off the couch] There are many good websites devoted to helping people find platonic friends. [uh, oh. Someone's been burned!]
I don't like dating games or "the rules". There are many smooth operators out there and I am not one of them.[really? I am so swept off my feet right now by your optimism and zest for life, I thought you were Sade] If someone tells me something I tend to believe them. [OK, how about this--you need therapy. Seriously. Go get it]
I admire women who are willing to stand on their own two feet. [oh, darn, we won't be a good match. I like to spend most of my time on my back] It's nice to find someone who chooses to be with me because she wants to be and not because she needs "someone". [I actually would question this woman. I think she is with him because she hates herself, but whatever] We're not placeholders until something better comes along. [well, actually, you are]
I should probably state now that I'm a big believer in equality between the sexes. My older brothers grew up changing my diapers, cleaning, and sewing. Mom mowed the lawn and painted the house. I don't see women as wilting flowers. [but rather as work mules who must prove their worth attaining my goals of you painting the house]
Have a good day! [and ends on a happy note. Go figure]
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Stay tuned for a new idea!
So not sure yet if it is going to be a You Tube video or part of the blog, but I feel the need to share with you all the crap profiles I have to wade through in my search for Mr. Right on Match.com. I mean, seriously? You have got to read some of these. Oh so frightening. Non-sensical. And scary.
Stay tuned, more to follow.
Stay tuned, more to follow.
Friday, May 15, 2009
This is probably a bad idea . . .
especially after my last post, but every Friday, M&M/Mars is giving away free candy bars to the first 250,000 people that go to www.realchocolate.com and register. They send you a coupon in like 6 weeks. It goes every Friday until the end of September. Go get your chocolate fix, peeps!
I love me a good freebie! Even if it can be diet toxic. Hmm, maybe I should rethink this.
I love me a good freebie! Even if it can be diet toxic. Hmm, maybe I should rethink this.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Overwhelmed and Inspired
So I just read a blog that I have been following on the sly (cyber stalking would be a good term) and a woman who I relate with a LOT has revealed that she has gained back a lot of the weight she took off. And my heart bleeds for her. Because I have done that. I have been there. I could be there any second. I am heading there right now.
When you are a larger person, it takes a lot to lose weight. And it takes even more to keep it off. And if you give up the diligence, the tracking, the paying attention, the staying aware for a split second, you lose focus and you fall off the rope. And it is so. hard. to. get. back. on.
I am off the rope. But I am going to get back on.
I have a relay race this weekend. It is scaring the living crap out of me. So I have been shutting down, getting stressed, and eating. I commit to stopping that. I commit to getting out of here in the next 30 minutes and going to the gym. I commit to changing my life, filling my needs and not my stomach, and changing my life. I commit to looking and feeling good. And I commit to me. I am worth it. I can do it. I want to do it.
It's just that sometimes its so much. It's exhausting.
but that's OK. I can do it. I want to do it. I will do it.
Here's to you, Morgan. You are beautiful. Thank you for the reminder.
When you are a larger person, it takes a lot to lose weight. And it takes even more to keep it off. And if you give up the diligence, the tracking, the paying attention, the staying aware for a split second, you lose focus and you fall off the rope. And it is so. hard. to. get. back. on.
I am off the rope. But I am going to get back on.
I have a relay race this weekend. It is scaring the living crap out of me. So I have been shutting down, getting stressed, and eating. I commit to stopping that. I commit to getting out of here in the next 30 minutes and going to the gym. I commit to changing my life, filling my needs and not my stomach, and changing my life. I commit to looking and feeling good. And I commit to me. I am worth it. I can do it. I want to do it.
It's just that sometimes its so much. It's exhausting.
but that's OK. I can do it. I want to do it. I will do it.
Here's to you, Morgan. You are beautiful. Thank you for the reminder.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Why's it gotta be so hard?
So not sure what happened in the past few days, but I have been HUNGRY. I mean, HUNGRY. I just want to eat and eat and eat! I have controlled it for the most part, but definitely had three too many snacks, and I just had an ice cream melt down. So I know I haven't been exercising a lot, so this hunger is emotional. And it's nice to recognize that, and I even know the burning question that is causing it--and it will continue throughout this weekend. Now I just need to figure out the steps to work around it. Not sure why I have to make this so hard. You know, I just have to decide the direction of my life for the next twenty years or so. That's all. No big whoop.
Sigh. I love/hate long term commitments.
Sigh. I love/hate long term commitments.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
So maybe I got this wrong
So here I am thinking that maybe I got this whole thing wrong. What exactly is love anyhow? What is the fairy tale? Is there a fairy tale? Or is it just stupid nonsense? I want the true love, the connection that you make with a perfect stranger who is hot and rocks your world, and then you talk to and meet and they are everything you ever wanted. But everytime I find someone I fall off the cliff for, they turn out to be crazy. I mean, genuinely psycho. Something is really wrong with them. So I am considering changing my outlook. Maybe I find a nice guy. See if we have a lot in common, a bunch to teach other, if we share interests, if we mesh. And if we do, maybe cultivate it. Work to find the positives, the common ground, the respect and love, the joy, the happiness, the love and support. And maybe when that all happens, we have a wonderful, beautiful mutual relationship built on love respect and trust. And maybe it will be way different than that fairy tale, but so much better. And so much longer. And then 30 years from now, when the kids are out of college or settled into whatever life they have chosen for themselves, we head out to hike and snowboard and continue to enjoy each other, our adventures, our ideas, our love. And it is amazing and wonderful.
Or I just have another glass of wine, fine Joel McHale and convince him I the woman of his dreams.
Something like that.
Sigh. I guess I will keep on chugging along.
Or I just have another glass of wine, fine Joel McHale and convince him I the woman of his dreams.
Something like that.
Sigh. I guess I will keep on chugging along.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
So exactly what is this blog anyway?
I was having a hard time recognizing and classifying and what I was going to do with this blog. And I just decided. This is going to be a snapshot blog--one of my life, my running (or the exercise du jour) and my weight journey. Right now it's my "weight loss" journey, but I know it will eventually become my "weight maintenance" journey.
Right now, the journey is going well. Really well. It's been over a year since I started making a conscious effort to lose weight, and about 10 months since I started losing. I did some crazy hours of exercise in the fall, and dropped off a cliff in mid-January. Yet I have maintained during that time through conscious effort and watching my diet. And I am back on the downward streak (although only for about a week now, if I am to be completely honest). But I am back on track for loss and I am proud of that. I have big plans for the next few months, but I am fine taking it a little bit slow. I am going to lose another 20 pounds. I am going to keep searching for, and hope to find, the man of my dreams. And I am going to practice writing again, because I love and miss it. So this blog will help me with all that.
OK, now that I have declared my intentions for the blog, let me talk working out. I have been running again, back up to about 3 days a week. This week I am going for five. Some runs are easy, some are hard. My running class is tonight, and I am going to talk to them about my options--I just don't know if this is the right class for me. I am going to a SUPER early running group tomorrow, to check it out. And I am going to run on Thursday after my work out. Saturday I may meet the running group again for my long run, which could be great. And, BAM!, I am up to five days (I already ran about 4 miles yesterday)!
I have been doing a great job eating healthy, but like I have said (to myself) in the past, when I am ready, it is easy. And it's easy right now. So that's exciting. I have been preparing my food, getting lots of fruits and veggies, and keeping my dishes clean--all good signs! I have a goal of losing 2 pounds at my weigh in on Friday, which means I will have hit my 10% with Weight Watchers--finally! I will keep you posted.
And I am going on dates and rediscovering what works, and doesn't work, for me in a relationship. And I still have a lot to learn, but it's fun and I am enjoying myself. I refuse to allow myself to put any pressure on the situation, and trusting the process, relaxing, and enjoying this exploration.
So there we go. I will get more specific in coming days, because I want to write 3-4 times a week here. That should give me plenty of time to update and report, as well as fill in the holes!
Right now, the journey is going well. Really well. It's been over a year since I started making a conscious effort to lose weight, and about 10 months since I started losing. I did some crazy hours of exercise in the fall, and dropped off a cliff in mid-January. Yet I have maintained during that time through conscious effort and watching my diet. And I am back on the downward streak (although only for about a week now, if I am to be completely honest). But I am back on track for loss and I am proud of that. I have big plans for the next few months, but I am fine taking it a little bit slow. I am going to lose another 20 pounds. I am going to keep searching for, and hope to find, the man of my dreams. And I am going to practice writing again, because I love and miss it. So this blog will help me with all that.
OK, now that I have declared my intentions for the blog, let me talk working out. I have been running again, back up to about 3 days a week. This week I am going for five. Some runs are easy, some are hard. My running class is tonight, and I am going to talk to them about my options--I just don't know if this is the right class for me. I am going to a SUPER early running group tomorrow, to check it out. And I am going to run on Thursday after my work out. Saturday I may meet the running group again for my long run, which could be great. And, BAM!, I am up to five days (I already ran about 4 miles yesterday)!
I have been doing a great job eating healthy, but like I have said (to myself) in the past, when I am ready, it is easy. And it's easy right now. So that's exciting. I have been preparing my food, getting lots of fruits and veggies, and keeping my dishes clean--all good signs! I have a goal of losing 2 pounds at my weigh in on Friday, which means I will have hit my 10% with Weight Watchers--finally! I will keep you posted.
And I am going on dates and rediscovering what works, and doesn't work, for me in a relationship. And I still have a lot to learn, but it's fun and I am enjoying myself. I refuse to allow myself to put any pressure on the situation, and trusting the process, relaxing, and enjoying this exploration.
So there we go. I will get more specific in coming days, because I want to write 3-4 times a week here. That should give me plenty of time to update and report, as well as fill in the holes!
Friday, March 27, 2009
A little financial humor for a Friday
Investment Banking Explained
Young Chuck moved to Texas and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day the farmer drove up and said, 'Sorry Chuck, but I have some bad news, the donkey died.'
Chuck replied, 'Well, then just give me my money back.'
The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I went and spent it already.'
Chuck said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'
The farmer asked, 'What ya gonna do with a dead donkey?
Chuck said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'
The farmer said 'You can't raffle off a dead donkey!'
Chuck said, 'Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'
A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, 'What happened with that dead donkey?'
Chuck said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $898.00.'
The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'
Chuck said, 'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.'
Chuck went on to work for Morgan Stanley.
Young Chuck moved to Texas and bought a donkey from a farmer for $100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.
The next day the farmer drove up and said, 'Sorry Chuck, but I have some bad news, the donkey died.'
Chuck replied, 'Well, then just give me my money back.'
The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I went and spent it already.'
Chuck said, 'OK, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'
The farmer asked, 'What ya gonna do with a dead donkey?
Chuck said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'
The farmer said 'You can't raffle off a dead donkey!'
Chuck said, 'Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead.'
A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, 'What happened with that dead donkey?'
Chuck said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $898.00.'
The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'
Chuck said, 'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back.'
Chuck went on to work for Morgan Stanley.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Back in the game!
So I am back in the game of running! I didn't run other than my running class last week, but this week I wanted to get back on track. I did my work out on Monday with my trainer, then had a dinner date. Tuesday I had my running class, Wed morning I got up and ran for 36 minutes, and tonight I plan to run after my work out. I am going to aim for an hour. Tomorrow my goal is to run before work again. This should put me in the 12-14 mile total for the week, which I am happy with! And next week I can start on official half marathon training. Sweet!
I think I am slowly getting faster. I will be on the treadmill tonight, so I will start at 5.7 and see how it goes. I figure if I jack up the speed even by just .1 each week, it won't be long before I am at 6.0. I am excited for that!
I think I am slowly getting faster. I will be on the treadmill tonight, so I will start at 5.7 and see how it goes. I figure if I jack up the speed even by just .1 each week, it won't be long before I am at 6.0. I am excited for that!
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Well, Happy St. Patrick's Day to you all! Today's my holiday, but it is filled with work and running class. However, I may break down and do some fine beer this evening, just to celebrate my heritage. Oh, and to have some QT with my girls!
I found this joke on a website and decided to share it with you all. Enjoy!
Mr. Three Beers
An Irishman walks into a pub in a small town in Ireland and orders three beers. The man takes the beers to a table where he sits alone and polishes them off in about an hour. He gets up, orders three more and does the same thing. Another hour later, he gets one more round of three, drinks them and leaves.
This scene repeats itself the next evening and then the next, and pretty soon this pub is abuzz about the man they're now calling Mr. Three Beers. When he comes in again, the bartender's curiosity is overwhelming, and he asks his new favorite customer what the deal is.
He replies that he has two brothers who are no longer in Ireland, they're worlds apart, and they all vowed that each would order an extra two beers whenever one of them went drinking to keep the brotherly bond.
The bartender and the tavern regulars bought the story, admiring the brotherly love, and Mr. Three Beers became a pub favorite.
But one day he came in and ordered only two beers. The bartender poured them and the pub crawlers took immediate notice, thinking the worst -- that one of the brothers had passed away. This went on for several days.
One day, the bartender offered his condolences on behalf of himself and the pub regulars. The man thanked him for the thoughtfulness but said his two brothers were alive and well.
So what's with ordering only two beers? the barkeep asked.
"It's Lent," the man replied, "and I, myself, have decided to give up drinking until Easter."
I found this joke on a website and decided to share it with you all. Enjoy!
Mr. Three Beers
An Irishman walks into a pub in a small town in Ireland and orders three beers. The man takes the beers to a table where he sits alone and polishes them off in about an hour. He gets up, orders three more and does the same thing. Another hour later, he gets one more round of three, drinks them and leaves.
This scene repeats itself the next evening and then the next, and pretty soon this pub is abuzz about the man they're now calling Mr. Three Beers. When he comes in again, the bartender's curiosity is overwhelming, and he asks his new favorite customer what the deal is.
He replies that he has two brothers who are no longer in Ireland, they're worlds apart, and they all vowed that each would order an extra two beers whenever one of them went drinking to keep the brotherly bond.
The bartender and the tavern regulars bought the story, admiring the brotherly love, and Mr. Three Beers became a pub favorite.
But one day he came in and ordered only two beers. The bartender poured them and the pub crawlers took immediate notice, thinking the worst -- that one of the brothers had passed away. This went on for several days.
One day, the bartender offered his condolences on behalf of himself and the pub regulars. The man thanked him for the thoughtfulness but said his two brothers were alive and well.
So what's with ordering only two beers? the barkeep asked.
"It's Lent," the man replied, "and I, myself, have decided to give up drinking until Easter."
Monday, March 16, 2009
Public or private?
So, granted, this blog is public. But it is also private--very few people know of it, and I believe those that do know of it don't think I have started it yet. I therefore think I am going to keep it semi-anonymous for now. What does that mean?
1. No info about my job. I don't think I would do that anyhow. Too many ramifcations.
2. No info about dates (unless it's a great story or I have no plans to see you again)
3. Personal stuff, but try to be as discreet about it as possible.
Now considering I am not some major celebrity, and I don't think anyone is currently stalking me, I feel quite confident that my cover will stay safe--for now. And maybe one day I will share this gem of absolute trite and mundane postings with the world. But until then, I shall forever be quietly McFunski!
1. No info about my job. I don't think I would do that anyhow. Too many ramifcations.
2. No info about dates (unless it's a great story or I have no plans to see you again)
3. Personal stuff, but try to be as discreet about it as possible.
Now considering I am not some major celebrity, and I don't think anyone is currently stalking me, I feel quite confident that my cover will stay safe--for now. And maybe one day I will share this gem of absolute trite and mundane postings with the world. But until then, I shall forever be quietly McFunski!
Friday, March 13, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Inspirational running shot of the day
Here I am, at the Baltimore marathon in 2006. This was a few weeks before the horrific NYC Marathon crash and burn. I am posting to this to remember how far I have come, and show myself how much I have changed my body in the past year. And to remind me that running can (and should be) fun. As someone I know said last night "this feels good." And I confirmed that it should feel good. And I meant that--about life, about love, about running. Not that there isn't pain, but sometimes it's worth it. So on that note, I am definitely running 4 miles tonight after my work out.
What are you going to do today?
Running Scared
So I am going to give this blog a shot again. I love to write, but so far haven't committed to this. I am going to commit to now. Here we go!
I accomplished just about all my running goals (my Goofy time was short of where I wanted it to be), so I am proud of that. And I have taken time off running. I have survived that time without packing on any additional pounds (well, five or under, which is incredibly awesome for me) and now it is time to start running again. Although I have probably lost all of my ability, I am a little excited to get back out there. For the past few weeks I have been hitting the treadmill a couple of times a week to do runs of 30-40 minutes. It's nice to do runs like that, and by choice. But since I have three half marathons and a marathon so far scheduled for this year, I knew it was time to quit messing around and start training.
So I signed up for a class. A running class. With other people. And hill repeats, intervals, and group runs. Where I could be last. Or left behind. Or cause other people to wait. All my deep, dark fears about running, competition and measuring myself against others are coming screaming to the surface. But I am going to man up, show up, and make it happen. Wish me luck. I am going to need it!
On to the next phase of my healthy life! Care to tag along?
I accomplished just about all my running goals (my Goofy time was short of where I wanted it to be), so I am proud of that. And I have taken time off running. I have survived that time without packing on any additional pounds (well, five or under, which is incredibly awesome for me) and now it is time to start running again. Although I have probably lost all of my ability, I am a little excited to get back out there. For the past few weeks I have been hitting the treadmill a couple of times a week to do runs of 30-40 minutes. It's nice to do runs like that, and by choice. But since I have three half marathons and a marathon so far scheduled for this year, I knew it was time to quit messing around and start training.
So I signed up for a class. A running class. With other people. And hill repeats, intervals, and group runs. Where I could be last. Or left behind. Or cause other people to wait. All my deep, dark fears about running, competition and measuring myself against others are coming screaming to the surface. But I am going to man up, show up, and make it happen. Wish me luck. I am going to need it!
On to the next phase of my healthy life! Care to tag along?
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